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Quarantine Crackers, and yes we're OK.

Updated: Jan 7, 2021

I know, groan, another pandemic virus post thingy on the internets...

But come on be honest - By this point you need a new snack right?! We can't make stuff if we don't eat...

I present to you Quarantine Crackers!

So spicy they'll burn just about anything out of your system!

(Not really.)

((And actually they're called "Fire Crackers."))

(((But they are tasty, and I did make them all by myself!)))

Alrighty, so basically the plan is we turn boring unsalted saltine crackers into tasty spicy flavor nugget snacks. And the best part, they don't go stale like normal crackers!

(Sidebar - are they still "salt"tine crackers if they're unsalted?)

Here's the link to the full recipe and write-up from Lisa48Frog's instructable:

I mostly-ish followed the directions 😉.

In a nutshell (no actual nuts involved...):

Take a cup of canola oil

Mix in a couple tablespoons of powdered ranch dressing

2 Tablespoons of red pepper flakes

1/2 teaspoon of garlic powder

Mix it some more.

Put the whole box of crackers in a tupperware that has a working lid.

Pour the mixture all over the unsalted saltine crackers.

Flip the container in about 5 minutes.

Repeat flipping the container until you forget you were supposed to flip it.

Ensure container is right side up.

Open container, remove cracker.

Insert cracker in mouth.

Masticate cracker.

(I said masticate, it means to chew. Sheesh, can't take you anywhere... 😜)


Repeat until satisfied or mouth is on fire.

And now the quick laboratory status update: Yes Wiferneer and I are ok. Yes Makerneer is still open. Yes we are cleaning our equipment more often now. No, I still am not sneezing or coughing on anything I send out. Yes I know this is a serious topic, thank you for letting me have a quick lighthearted go at it, we all need to laugh a little sometimes!

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